Have You Ever Said “I Just Don’t Feel Like Dating?”

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Two people kissing in restaurant

Image: Derek Key

I hope that you’re having an amazing week. Last week during a private coaching call my client stated, “Erica, I just don’t feel like dating. It seems like after working and going to the gym, I am just burnt out. It seems like I’m giving the last bit of energy to dating and I don’t want to do that.”

If you seem to feel the same way, you’re not alone. The reason that you may feel this way is because you’re forgetting the most important person in the world… YOU!

You have to remember that you are not a machine or superwoman. You have to take time out for yourself.

I want you to imagine going on a date with an attractive man. During the date, he expresses how tired he always is from working, he never has time for himself, and he physically looks tired. His energy level is low and he looks drained. What thoughts are going to run through your mind?

Here is what I would be thinking:

I don’t think this is the type of man I would like to build a relationship with.

Why doesn’t he take better care of himself?

If he is always tired and run down, I bet you this relationship is going to be boring.

If you’re serious about meeting that special someone and want to date then you have to take care of yourself.

Here are a few steps that you can take:

1. Get clear on what is draining your energy. If you have too many things on your plate, learn to delegate.

2. Rest. I believe in this and I live by it. God says that we’re supposed to work six days and rest one. I live my life on a calendar and one day per week I do absolutely none thing. It is mainly on Saturdays.

3. Be smart with dating. If you joined an online dating site then only spend about 2 hours a week on the site. Put it in your calendar on what days of the week you’re going to respond to e-mails, look through profiles, and schedule phone calls.

4. Spend every day doing something that brings you joy and gives you energy.

I really want to see you succeed in your love life but first you have to make sure you take care of yourself.

Wishing you love and success,

Erica Johnson

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