Wably Celebrity

Did Johnny Depp Hit His Wife: An Objective Look

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Johnny Depp

Image: WIkipedia

You may have heard by now that Johnny Depp and his wife Amber Heard are separating, likely due to the residual stress of being forced by the Austrailian government to issue an apology for bringing their dogs into the country.

You likely have also heard that now Amber is alleging that Johnny once struck her in the face, with an iPhone specifically.

This has raised no shortage of eyebrows as Johnny Depp is one of the nation’s most beloved celebrities and Amber Heard is perhaps best known as that person who was married to Johnny Depp. So if we are to believe that Johnny did indeed strike her, it’s going to require a bit of proof. And thus far, people have been quick to call Amber a liar. However, is this victim blaming? Is the tide of public opinion rushing to defend the actions of someone who did, in fact, hit his wife simply because we like him more than we like her?

Well, let’s take a look at some of the evidence.

First, and perhaps most damning, is the photo Amber submitted to a court showing her with a prominent bruise around her right eye. And though I am hardly a medical expert(my degree is actually in history, weird right?), those do seem to be injuries that could be consistent with the star of Edward Scissorhands getting coked up and throwing an iPhone at you. Are there other reasons that she might have a black eye? Sure. It’s possible that she fell or ran into something, or depending on how much you dislike Amber Heard now, you may be willing to believe she did that to herself in order to secure a better settlement in the divorce, which would display some impressive duplicity and insanity in equal measure.

But any speculation about the origins of that shiner must remain so as we really have no evidence one way or the other. It’s just her word against his at this point. It is worth noting that on a recent evening the police were called to Depp’s home where they met Amber who they say both refused to ask for a report and had no evidence of injury, though the violence could have come later, so that’s not conclusive either way.

So what about Johnny’s character? Is he the kind of guy who would do this? Well, according to his ex-wife/girlfriends, no, they don’t think so. Amber has alleged that drugs and alcohol played a role, and as anyone who has ever dated anyone addicted to cocaine can probably tell you, it can lead someone to hit people they likely would not have hit otherwise. So is Johnny going off the deep end and engaging in some drug-fueled domestic violence? I think we would be remiss if we dismissed the idea out of hand, but again, there is really no evidence that I am aware of.

So with a paucity of hard facts, let’s get into the assinine anecdotal stuff, shall we? Doug Stanhope, who I understand after some research is a comedian, claims that he was told by Johnny in person that Amber had threatened to lie about him in public if he didn’t agree to her demands in the divorce. Is that credible? Well, Doug and Johnny seem to have met on at least a few occasions if Google Images is to be believed.

doug and johnny

Image: Reddit

That’s Doug on the left, with Johnny Depp sandwiched between himself and his girlfriend Bingo, who shockingly is a person and not a dog, despite being named Bingo.

As someone who internets semi-professionally I couldn’t turn up an instance of Johnny Depp hitting a romantic partner before under the influence of drugs, but has he had some problem with drugs? Yep, for a few decades now. In fact, as recently as last year he had to stop shooting the Pirates of the Carribean sequel to enter rehab.

It’s possible that Johnny is in the middle of a particularly bad relapse after his mother died, and as a result he lashed out at Amber.

So did Johnny Depp hit his wife? Maybe. Maybe not. Unless some more evidence presents itself though, I think it’s safe to give Johnny the benefit of the doubt on this one. Yeah, sorry everyone, I sort of promised you some resolution and didn’t deliver. Didn’t take you all the way, so to speak.

But, hey, on the plus side now you know how all my ex-girlfriends feel.

Welp, guess that’s it. Tune in tomorrow when we probe some more of Hollywood’s deepest mysteries, like whether Snoop Dog is actually the reincarnation of Emperor Haile Selassie.

He’s not.